How to Get Through A Bad Day (Part 2)

Go ahead and dwell on all the things that are going wrong. Yes, normally, it's good not to think too long or too hard about all that is 'wrong' with your life, but sometimes bad things have to be faced. Perhaps you've been avoiding dealing with certain issues, which is why they've come back to haunt you now. Maybe you're lousy with money or have financially bitten off more than you can chew. Review your finances. Find out why your lights are always in danger of being cut off or your mortgage payment has been 30 days past due for the last year. No, it's not easy to face it, but you'll feel much better when it's said and done. Hunker down and come up with a budget to pay down some bills. Realize when you need to just say no. Say no to shopping sprees. Say no to a new car. Say no to your current job. Recognize where you are and what you can do to get out of that financial hole.

Maybe the problem misery came as a result of problems you have with your ex-spouse or ex-lover and the children the two of you share. Call you ex and come up with a firm visitation schedule for your children so you won't have to be solely responsible for them in case of emergencies. Make sure your financial arrangements with him or her are what they should be and that they are taking equal responsibility in picking the kids up or taking the kids to certain activities. And if that ex won't cooperate with your efforts to negotiate, cut them out of your thinking. Say, yes, he or she is a bad egg, and resolve to make the best of things with as little of his or her help as needed. And move on with your life.

Go ahead and think long and hard all those people that have done you wrong. Perhaps it takes just such a rotten, miserable day to realize the people you thought were your friends really are not. Remember all the things you did for them and the few or paltry things they did for you in return. Remember all the negative, ugly nasty things that person said about you (behind your back no less). And then recognize your need for distance from that person. Realize they have been poisoning your life. And let them go.

Think long and hard about all the bad things that have brought you to this day. Who did what, what you did wrong, what you don't want to or have refused to confront, etc., etc. Cry if you need to. Get mad if you need to. And then make efforts to change those things that you can. Accept the things that you cannot. And live with all the rest.

If need be, call off work and stay home with a good cup of tea or the remains of the cake from your son's birthday party. It's okay to indulge in your bad habits for one day (as long as they are not life-threatening or harmful to yourself or another person). It's okay to take one day or one week or one month to be with yourself. Your boss will find some way of getting along without you, your friends will support you in and your spouse will love you enough to give you what you need. Let yourself be 'down' for a little while. Allow yourself to get good and 'depressed.' Have a pity party. Think of all the bad, horrible, rotten, unfair things that you normally put away somewhere in your subconscious. Take out your anger on hitting a few pillows. Call a good friend and rant and rave for an hour or two. Stay still and listen to your inner voice reminding you of all those things you'd rather not think about. Allow your emotions free reign. Temporarily. And if you find that you cannot spend one day out of a month facing bad things and that it extends to days, weeks or months, you may need to seek professional help. And that's okay, too.

The reason it is okay to be 'down' temporarily is that it helps to remind you of a simple truth - most bad days are the result of bad months, bad years, bad choices and bad situations. And being down is a good time to acknowledge that truth. Sometimes you see more clearly in the midst of pain than at any other time. Most 'bad' days are not the result of any great mystery - there is usually a sound and concrete reason why this day is the day to end all bad days. You find that you haven't been getting enough sleep. Your eating habits have been lousy. You have a terrible temper and you've taken it out on one too many people in the last few days. You are terrible with your finances. Your kids really are out of control. You are out of control. You stay out too late. You go to bed too early. Something, somewhere in your life has gone out of whack and you need to fix it. Ignore these signals your body and mind are sending to you on these 'bad' days and miss out on some important clues about your life. Your body and your mind are trying to tell you something. Are you listening?

Through all of these ups and downs and times of discovery - pray. Talk to God. Yes, I know you don't feel like praying (who does, on these types of days?), but it's important. And I'm not talking about a 'hallowed be Thy name' type prayer. I'm talking about real prayer. Where you tell God exactly how you feel, no holds barred. Even if you only want to tell Him what a lousy day you are having. Or complain about your kids. Or question why you must go through this. Talk to Him. He's heard it all before and He does not condemn you for it. He welcomes open dialogue. He tells the Israelites 'Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: thought your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; thought they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.' in Isaiah 1:18. Surely, He can have a conversation with you when you need to get a few things off your chest. He understands what you are going through. He made you after all, He knows exactly how you work. And remember - Jesus came and suffered as we did, as a man. He's felt what you have felt. He's been through what you are going through. He can relate. And he is right there on at the right hand of God intervening for us, talking to God about us. Talk to God. Be honest about your feelings. It will help you immensely.

Remember - this too shall pass. Maybe not today and maybe not even next week, but eventually. Recognize that most bad days are the result of other 'bad' things in our lives that need to be corrected. And some bad days just are. In either case, you will get through it. Tomorrow is coming and this day will soon be just one more memory in the life that you make for yourself.

Religion, Spirituality, Christian, Christianity, Self-Help, Advice